Shave Shave Hooray!

I shave my face now. No, I’m not transitioning or having a Britney moment. What I’m doing is one of the it skincare and beauty trends of late and I can’t believe I waited so long to try it. You’ve likely heard of Dermaplaning (it has been around for awhile) or wondered about it yourself haven’t you? If the term shaving your face makes you a tad uncomfortable or dissuades you from trying, we can use Dermaplaning. Much prettier isn’t it? “Hey Connie, I’m shaving my face now.” or “Hey Connie, I’m dermaplaning my face now.” Definitely a difference. I’m the type to call a fig a fig though and it’s basically shaving your face… and you want to do it.

Today, I’m going to debunk two of the biggest reasons why I waited so long to try and, what I’m guessing, may be your own two biggest fears. I’m also going to give you a few pointers because in my limbo of fear, I did major research, read reviews, researched some more, reviewed some more and then researched again just in case before I delved into it. 

For anyone wondering what I’m even talking about, dermaplaning (or face-shaving in my books) is a procedure you receive by a trained technician one to two times a month, with each session lasting around thirty minutes. The cost is relatively low considering costs of other skin treatments. In the session, the technician surgically scrapes any irregularities off the surface of your skin using a sharp blade. New gadgets have also hit the market for you to achieve similar results at home. The process removes the outer-most layer of dead skin and any peach fuzz found on the face. As someone who isn’t hairy, let me just say you never thought you had a mustache until you dermaplane. You never thought you had peach fuzz until it clumps up on your face the same way your dog’s hair clumps in the comb. You never thought you had dead skin because you exfoliate often with your cleanser but then you see your face glowing like a happy little firefly on a summer night after you do it. It’s kind of horrifying, addicting and amazing all at once. 

I watched blogger after blogger and models and influencers rave about this process. I saw trusted professional services offering it and read article after article about how wonderful it was for your skin. I read the cons and scoured reviews of products only for the negatives and kept coming up empty-handed. Obviously there are some cons but not the ones you’d think. I was intrigued as the benefits of this treatment were wild—brighter skin, minimizing fine lines, lessening age spots/discoleratin, makeup going on flawlessly, makeup not settling into fine lines as much, skin regenerating new cells more quickly for younger looking skin, minimizing acne scars, less breakouts, I mean on and on. I was terrified to try it for two reasons only–that my hair would grow back darker and thicker. Somehow I saw myself morpohing into The Bearded Lady in The Greatest Showman

What tipped me over the edge? It wasn’t the constant debunking of my two fears. It was that I rolled into the new decade on the other side of thirty-five and I couldn’t help but notice signs of aging settling in (to my fine lines). At last, based on my research and my vanity, I was finally convinced to go for it. I can assure you the two fears I was most concerned about are myths and I’m going to kick in a few tips for you if you opt for an in-home treatment as I did. You can pay to go see a technician for the professional service, but you can also do it in home just as easily and with pretty similar results. I’m not telling you what to do either way—you have to do what you are comfortable with and these are my personal results.

1.) Will my hair will grow back thicker? No it won’t. I’ll say that again for those in the back–NO. It won’t. What your facial hair was, it will continue to be. Shaving doesn’t change the structure of your hair follicle. This is probably the biggest myth with dermaplaning. I know it was my biggest fear. I was convinced that my tiny, blonde wispy hairs would grow back thicker and coarser. Biologically, it’s simply not true. If you already have coarse hair, expect for it to stay the same. If you have wispy hair like I did, expect it to stay the same. No thicker. No bearded lady. 

2.) Will my hair grow back darker? No. It’s not going to magically change colors anymore than your eyebrows change colors or your hair on your head changes color when it grows. It’s going to come in not only the same density (as discussed above), but also the same color. Again, your genetics determine your hair follicle and it’s not going to change by shaving. 

I think that these two fears can be compared to people who get lash extensions. When you take off lash extensions it’s a shock. Your lashes likely haven’t changed much but it seems like they’re gone. That you suddenly have no lashes. With dermaplaning, once you have shaved and know what you look like without that forest of peach fuzz, it will seem more noticeable to you if you let it grow back because you’ve gotten used to it not being there. It’s not going to come back any darker or thicker but once you’ve done this treatment you notice the difference. Just like plucking, too. Remember that first time you did your brows and you realized you had rocked a unibrow for a few years? Was that just me? Anyone? Ok maybe that was just me. But my point is you realize it only because you are aware. 

I have a few tips for doing this procedure in-home. 

1.) The tool is important. You do not use a normal razor on your face. Don’t be whipping out your shaver for your legs to do your face or stealing your husband’s trusty blade. Use a single blade. My favorite is the Tinkle razor three-pack. Not only do they work great but they are dirt cheap. Get them here: https://www.tinkleyourface.com You can snag these on Amazon as well, but there are a lot of sellers sneaking in fake razors. I didn’t want to chance it. I’d pay to be sure you get what you want.

2.) Always dermaplane with a clean, makeup-free face. I like to do it at night after I remove makeup and cleanse. If you don’t, you are just scraping off makeup, ruin the razor and miss a ton of hairs and skin. Afterwards I cleanse again and give my face a dousing of my favorite serum and then moisturize. 

3.) While you’re at it, touch up those brows. Don’t forget your brows. This is an amazing way to remove some unibrow action and get those pesky hairs under the brow bone area. You want to be ultra careful around your eyes (do I really even need to say that?) as your skin is thin there. Despite waxing or plucking religiously, you don’t always get all the hairs and sometimes you can’t even see them—but they’re there. This will remove them for epic wow brows. Just don’t shave off your brow tails. Slow and steady.

4.) Do your entire face. Don’t just do your chin or skip your nose or your forehead. Afterwards, you’ll notice—so will everyone else. Do your entire face. It will especially affect your makeup if you only do one area—why does she have a funky shadow on her forehead? I like to start around my cheekbones and work my way down to my chin. I then start up at my forehead/brow area and finish with my nose and upper lip. Remember, this process isn’t all about the hair—it’s about getting rid of the dead skin. So even if you have little to no hair on your forehead, you want to get rid of that layer of dead skin. Also, don’t go against the grain (for lack of a better term) and careful around your hair line so you don’t start shaving your head.

5.) It’s addicting but don’t overdue this. Do it on an as-needed basis. You’ll know. Just like your at-home glycolic peel or microderm, you only do them a couple of times a week MAX. This is a whole other level treatment, so I would say once a week max if not once every two weeks. Like I said, you’ll know. You don’t necessarily want stubble growing back but don’t overdue it for the sake of your skin.

6.) Be careful with sun exposure immediately following dermaplaning. You should be wearing SPF every single day as is, but still be careful going in the sun after doing this—it’s fresh new skin you’ve uncovered and it will fry. 

There you have it folks. I’m hooked and you will be too. My initial results were incredible and immediate. My skin is brighter, healthier, younger looking and will continue to be with each swipe of my Tinkle blade. My makeup (which I had a pretty good makeup game to begin with) leveled up. It will transform your skin. Don’t wait to try it as long as I did out of fear of the beard. It’s a myth. Again, speak to a professional if it will make you feel better and maybe have it done professionally the first time. However you decide to finally delve into this, I think you’ll love it and if you’re still scared to admit you’re a face-shaver I promise your secret is safe with me. 

I’d love to hear your feedback if you decide to try or if you’ve been on this for awhile, tell me your results and how you are liking it. Maybe I missed a tip you want to share–please do so below. Also, leave any questions in the comments and I’ll do my best to answer them.

Direct Selling 101: Dealing with the Berthas.

Direct sales is hard. Anyone who tells you otherwise is full of shit. And sadly, those people are out there. They promise you riches beyond your wildest dreams. They promise it’s an easy, marketable product. They swear you can work without a lick of effort because customers will just fall from the heavens right into your lap, dripping in glitter and spending oodles of their money on your product and all you have to do is one simple post on Facebook. It’s a lie. I’m on to those pitching you that. I’m watching them in shame—some of them may even be reading this.

Here’s the thing. Direct sales does work. It can be life-changing. It can save someone’s life–literally. You CAN make money. You can do it with class, sass and have a ton of fun on the journey. I say this not from assumption but from personal experience. All of the above are truths I can vehemently vouch for. But it’s hard work and it takes effort to overcome some of the obstacles you get dealt in this gig.

The company I am a part of believes deeply in the golden rule, which is to treat others the way you want to be treated —all you Christians reading this better have gotten that or you best head on back to church this weekend. Anyway, I want to honor that golden rule. I wish I had known some of the things I know now when I started. Before you have to go through and learn the lessons I’ve learned from this business, I’m going to share some advice and most honest transparency with you so that you can find comfort, learn or at least be informed before you take a dive into this industry.

Direct selling is hard because we carry a stigma in society. There are a lot of super crotchety former reps out there and even more people with a deeply ingrained opinion of us all.  I don’t know where it developed. I don’t know who is at fault. All I know is it hurts us. Over the years, it has never gotten easier and I hate admitting that but I promised truth. I move often and each time I’m getting to know a new mom or friend, the question of what I do always arises—typically after she asks what my husband does, isn’t that annoying? Anyway, the moment I say I sell a product with a direct selling company it happens. She glosses over, panics, maybe wets her pants a little–I don’t know but it’s almost always the same. “I could never do sales.” No ones asked if you could. “I had a friend who did that once and she didn’t succeed in it.” Yea, you usually don’t if you quit. “I like my Mac and Clinique.” Name dropper. “Oh, isn’t that a pyramid scheme?” No, and I could write you a ten-page paper citing facts on why it isn’t but like anti-vaccers staring fact versus proven lies straight in the face, it would fall on blinded eyes. I’ll smile while these answers run through my head like a pinball in a machine, but those comments tear at my heart and my self worth. They hurt. They’re rude—usually unintentionally. They make me feel little, shamed and send a clear message she has no intention of supporting me. So I close up. Terrified to ever mention my small business again—even though it’s the hers of the world that I need most to support me.

It’s always so confusing because I see them supporting a local boutique—going so far as to do try-ons or sharing coupon codes. I see them supporting a stranger they follow on Instagram who’s on a fitness journey and she’s sharing recipes from this person out of blind faith they’re any good. I see her supporting her hairstylist with before and after selfies. I see ME supporting her in her own business endeavors. I even see her pushing that new Kylie lip kit in apparent support of Kylie’s continued ass shots from her private jet. But when it comes to us direct sales gals…crickets. Why is that? Why won’t she help us? 

Now that I have you convinced to never do direct sales, let me tell you my best guidance on this and give you hope. When this happens, don’t give away your power. Also take this counsel with you through life in general. Stop giving away your power to people. What does that mean? It means don’t over-explain. Don’t over-explain your choices, your decisions, your reasoning for having decided to do whatever it is you did/do. For example, Bertha at the church group (after asking what your husband does) asks what you do and you tell her you sell for  “blah blah blah” company and then she looks at you and says, “Oh, I could never do sales.” You respond with, “Interesting,” or, “Gotcha,” or my personal favorite, “Ok.” Done. End of topic. Ask her what she does. Move on.

You really need to practice the pause on this one because your knee jerk reaction is going to be to explain all the ways that it’s actually really easy to sell and anyone can do it and you aren’t a car salesperson—and here’s why—and people are selling themselves daily by all their pictures on social media—selling their kids and how happy their marriage is and their recipes and all the things. Blah blah blah, verbal vomit all over her and she just keeps looking at you like, oh hunny you’re so one of those people, and then suddenly you, breathless, decide to quit direct sales.

It’s the over-explaining. With each desperate reason you give her, you are giving away your power. It’s a total mind eff. It makes you want to beat your head against a wall and it makes YOU question your well thought out decisions. This random person, with one silly statement, has suddenly made you question something you were passionate about two minutes ago because she’s set herself up with that inconsiderate response to make it seem like you need to give her justification on why you do what it is you do AND if you can’t convince her why people can sell, she’s not only right but insinuating you can’t really sell it either. Might I add something? Most times we bring this anguish on ourselves. Bertha doesn’t even realize what she’s saying. We live in a very egocentric world where it’s all about me, me, me. You tell her what you do, she finds a way to turn the conversation to make it about her. We do this a lot. I do this unintentionally, you likely do as well. Was her comment lame? Totes. But we do have to take part of the blame for giving her that much power to doubt ourselves.

Doubt is a powerful thing. Think of it this way–you’ve got this boat. You can drag Bertha on to take a ride–kicking and screaming–only for her to get seasick and throw up everywhere ruining your boat and leaving you questioning if it was your captaining that made her ill. Or, you wave and leave her on the dock without letting her anywhere near your precious vessel. Bon voyage, Bertha! 

You have no obligation to convince or explain to anyone why your business is the best and you love it. Period. She wants on the boat? She needs to be onboard with you–ha, get it–onboard? Save your energy and passion for someone who wants it, someone who genuinely wants to see your boat or wants to take a cruise with you if even just for fun. Practice the pause, and don’t give away your power. You could literally answer, “Ok.” to all of the above questions I initially presented. It ends the convo and I promise it will stun her. She’s expecting an explanation. She’s expecting a reaction. Don’t give it. Be kind always, but protect yourself. This tiny, super simple trick will save you a ton of heartache, a ton of doubt in yourself and will leave you looking like an ultra confident business woman who really doesn’t care if someone gets it or not. I believe it’s part of the reason I’ve been as successful as I have in this business–if only it didn’t take me so stinking long to figure it out!

Let me also say this—sometimes Berthas come around. They might just need to see your boat sail for a little bit before they want to take a ride. They may need to see you in action as a captain before they trust you won’t drown them. I have hundreds of Berthas in my customer base and even on my team and it’s honestly in using this tactic that it happened. Also, there are people out there who will initially support you. People who will cheer for you the second you meet them. They will go out of their way to help you as best they can by liking your posts or trying your product before they go grab something similar at Target or telling their friends about you or simply talking to you about your gig. They’re out there. I promise. They’re absolute gold and they will be shiny, beautiful blessings in your business.